Reflections: I don't know what happened to me.

Hi.

So, after looking back at what I read: I'm really embarrassed.

Romance novel book club was AMAZING. IS Amazing. But damn. I read a lot of trashy romance novels. Part of this, not going to lie, is that all my coworkers read them and are totally into talking about what they are reading. (I work at a library, this is our version of "water cooler" chit chat. We're that nerdy.)

After looking at reading patterns, I think what happened was pretty simple. I have been struggling in my personal life and escapism via book has become incredibly important to me. I spent a lot of my life feeling like all the reading I needed to do should be "enriching" and "important." I moved away from that this year. I'd like to explain why.

In my first semester of library school, I was assigned to a group that was supposed to explore the theme of education vs. entertainment in libraries. It was such an awful project, but it really forced me to defend recreational reading. As in, people in my group seemed to think that reading anything not deemed "literary" was not as important as pure entertainment and escapism. I've thought long and hard about why that bothered me so deeply. That idea of some reading being better than others not only goes against my own experience of reading, but also creates and enforces ideas of cultural superiority. The literature that is considered "good" by many people in the publishing world, the review world, the "culture creators" and, yes, by librarians, is often written by fairly financially comfortable, highly educated white people. And you know what? I refuse to support a belief that because something is written for young people, ethnic minorities, urban youth, women, or "housewives" that it isn't as worthy of our attention. All reading has value to the person doing the reading. If that means that for a few hours you forget that your kids are pulling you in a million directions, that your life has not turned out the way you wanted it to be, that your job is mindless, that the socioeconomic system in which you are trapped hates you and systematically oppresses you--go for it. Read it.

Secondly, to be a good librarian, I need to not only know that certain genres exist and are popular, but I need to actually understand what is appealing about those genres. So while I read a lot of "trashy" romance novels, I 100% understand why they are popular. They are total escapism. As someone who has been very lonely for a long time, the idea that there is someone out there who would do anything to be with you, who loves you above all else, is pretty damn appealing. So I get it. I don't think romance readers believe that real life is like those books--I mean, that is the whole point of it. You read something that is so far removed from reality to forget your reality. I get it. I appreciate it. And frankly, I can enjoy it while still acknowledging the problems that exist in romance.

I've recently gotten into thrillers. These are also often derided by people who only read "literary fiction." But I've got to say, some of these books explore some interesting themes. I just read Michael Koryta's "The Ridge." It explores various themes of morality, death, religion, local superstition, etc. And while it does so on a surface level, any reader who wishes to can explore this further. And you know what? It was FUN to read.

Reading has always been a big part of my life. The books that I truly love are a part of my identity. The books I read this year included some truly amazing books, which I plan to highlight in the next few weeks. I spent too long reading books that I thought would make me a better person. But you know what? I'm a reader. I'll read anything. As long as a book makes me feel something deeply, that is a valuable reading experience.

So what did I take away from this practice of recording what I read? Mostly, that it is super exciting to be able to look back and say definitively, "Yes! I did read that!" It motivated me to finish books that I may have otherwise lagged on. The project also has helped me overcome some shame at reading things that aren't literary. I have some very dear friends that I know sneer at some of the books I read. And that is okay; to each his own. But I won't stop reading books that entertain me and make me a happier person because I'm worried about what someone else thinks of an author.

My goal for my 25th year is to read even more books and explore more genres. I hope to try to read more current books--I often don't read a book til months after it comes out, if not years later! It would also be nice to read more history. I love history and always enjoyed learning about different countries through history and literature. I would like to explore Norwegian and English history in more depth. I have read a lot about the Tudor period of English history, but not others. Finally, as I grow as a librarian, I want to read more YA literature. YA literature contains some of the most amazing books being published right now. It is an exciting field that is growing and changing. It isn't all vampires! Plus, I would like to extend my service area to teens and work more closely with them. I admire their energy, passion, and potential. They really inspire me, so I want to make sure I can relate to their reading habits.

So, that was being 24, in books. So far 25 has been great. Check back soon for highlights of my favorite books of 24! Thanks for listening. <3

Results! Results! Results!

Hello! I have returned.

A year ago, I started recording every book I read. In that 24th year of life, I also endured some bad shit. So...I read a lot of fluff. Like. A lot. I'm almost ashamed. But then I think about it, and those were hilarious books, and there is nothing like watching your friend read love scenes aloud while you make over 100 whoopie pies with your dearest friends and her boyfriend squirms. And then dancing drunkenly with nutcrackers. And then frightening your boyfriend's brother by drunkenly doing impressions of his adorable Southern mother. Or reading books because your middle aged coworkers won't shut up about them. Or reading books because a blog tells you to, and finding that you love all the suggestions.

SO, with no further ado: here are the first 3 months of my 24th year of life, in books:

June:
Wolf Hall--Hilary Mantel
Seven Up--Janet Evanovich
Hard Eight--Janet Evanovich
The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest--Siegg Larsson
To the Nines--Janet Evanovich
Pets and the Planet: A Practical Guide to Sustainable Pet Care--Carol Frischmann

July:
The Hunger Games--Suzanne Collins
Not Quite a Husband--Sherry Thomas
Blessed Unrest: How the Largest Movement in the World Came into Being and Why No One Saw It Coming--Paul Hawken
The White Queen--Phillipa Gregory*
Catching Fire--Suzanne Collins

August:
The Hedgehog's Dilemma--Phil Warwick
Something Wonderful--Judith McNaught
Girl in the Arena--Lise Haines
Ten Big Ones--Janet Evanovich
Eleven on Top--Janet Evanovich
His at Night--Sherry Thomas
Belfast Diary: War as a Way of Life--John Conroy
Almost Heaven--Judith McNaught
The Red Queen--Phillipa Gregory


Gosh, I read a lot of trash. Summer, you know? Depression, you know?

Next up: Fall, and a return to some more serious subject matter.

*I'm sorry, but every time I see the name Phillipa after this I will only think of this hottie.

Reading Habits + Stress

Lately I've been noticing that I can't seem to focus on non-fiction or even weightier fiction. All that holds my attention is fun, fast, fluff. I'm not sure if this is due to summer or other emotional stressors. It may be that due to all the heavy stuff going on in my life right now, the lighter fare allows me to escape. Books that allow you to totally disengage from your real life and to not think about "the big issues" can be helpful at times like this. The escapism factor has been studied a lot in terms of romance readers. I totally understand this. In fact, some of the smartest women I know love romance novels.

During times of great stress or emotional depth, the computer can actually be distracting for me. The wealth of information and the ability to find so much makes it hard to break off and focus on myself. To focus on simple things, like the way I'm breathing, or if my heart is beating too fast, or if I feel like I'm going to vomit...you know, the physical signs that you've got to stop. Just stop. And get a hold of yourself. Well, reading lets me do that. Reading a book gives you a chance to slow down. There are no hyperlinks. No other tabs to keep an eye on. No one gchatting you and interrupting the reading process. Book reading is a mental but also a physical act. For this reason, it seems therapeutic.

While I normally try to balance my reading between non-fiction, literary fiction, plus the occasional fluff, I've given this summer over to fluff. So, if anyone has some light reading they would recommend, please send it along. I have a long list of other titles that will be attempted come fall and colder weather. For now, bring on the mysteries, romance novels, and adventure stories. This will be a time to dream of different worlds.

Not Quite A Good One

Not Quite a Husband, by Sherry Thomas, has a ridiculous cover. It has a ridiculous plot. In fact, almost everything about it is ridiculous.

At first, I was hopeful. This was a story about a female doctor back in the early 1900's. She was briefly married to a handsome, brilliant mathematician, but their marriage fell apart for undisclosed reasons. Several years later, he comes to find her in India. Her father is ill and they journey back to England together. Along the way, they endure malaria (him), painful memories (both of them), and an uprising against the British (again, both of them). It seemed like this could be a story about an empowered woman who made her own choices and found love by staying true to herself. In some ways, that is true. The main character, Bryony, does in fact practice medicine throughout the book and refuses to give up her career for her husband's. She does go off on exciting adventures around the world. She does play an integral role in a war, not as a weak female caretaker but as a skilled surgeon.

But.

The only reason that it's "okay" for her to get back with this guy, for her to sleep with him, is because they used to be married. The language is lackluster and is really graphic in its description of the sex. I mean, I just never need to read about someone being "fiddled." In addition, Thomas tries to impose some sexual tension, but it feels forced. As a reader of romance novels, I prefer stories that have more developed relationships, more realistic tension. The characters she created were a) not realistic and b)probably wouldn't have been so stubborn with each other. The tension wouldn't have existed between the types of people she wrote. And I love tension.

Overall, I'm disappointed. I had hoped for better. Perhaps "His at Night" will be better. One can only hope. Sherry Thomas is NOT living up to her titles thus far.

Obstacle Overcome

As you may know, I have a hard time openly reading certain books. I also have decided to record each book I read this year. Today my resolve to read openly and publicly was tested for the first time.

I read a lot of review journals at work, and sometimes I read the fiction reviews for personal reasons, even though I don't buy these for the library. Today I ran across the most over the top review for what sounded like an over the top book. To make the situation even better, it was a romance novel! Some friends and I started a romance novel book club last summer and have thus far not picked a book for the inaugural read of Summer 2010. It seemed like the perfect choice. We didn't have it, but we had another, even more ridiculous title, on the shelf.



I had to read it.

However, I was embarrassed to a) be seen by the circulation people and b) ashamed to have to own up to reading it on my end of year list.

The solution to a? Self-check machines.

This wonderful machine, while *maybe* eliminating some human jobs in the long run, has made it so much easier for me to check out each and every book I want to read. I don't feel ashamed because no human (especially not a human that I work with) sees what I'm reading. It makes me feel a bit better. Library records should be private, but when you're working with the people checking you out, you know they notice what you're reading.

The answer to b? Well, I decided to tell you all right now so I can't lie later.

I'll let you know how it is.

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